Relieve Stress by Knowing Your Unique values
Wouldn’t it be nice to feel good in your own skin all the time? To be confident in who you are and have decisions feel clear and easy to make?
To live a meaningful and fulfilling life, understanding and living by your individual values is imperative.
If you live by what others want for you, whether it’s your family, friends, or society, you’ll probably find yourself stuck in a place of discontent and exhaustion.
So, where to start? Let's explore:
What’s important to you? It seems like a simple question, but the real answer is probably quite complex. Taking the time to sit down with yourself and take stock of what you think is valuable.
Why Recognizing Your Values Matters
Values serve as guiding principles that can shape our decisions, behaviors, and priorities. Everyone is different and it’s up to you to decide what to prioritize in the life you want to lead.
When we align our actions with our values, research shows we experience greater authenticity, satisfaction, and meaning in our lives. By recognizing and honoring our values, we create a roadmap for living a life that is true to our authentic selves.
Where to Start: Exploring Your Values
1. Reflection and Self-Inquiry
Set aside some quiet time to reflect on what truly matters to you. Try these thought-provoking questions from NYU Professor Suzy Welch:
- What do I want people to say about me when I'm not in the room?
- On my 90th birthday, what would make me cry with regret?
- When I think back to happy and healthy times in my life, childhood included, what was I doing or prioritizing?
2. Life Audit
Draw circle, and divide it into pieces pieces for different areas of your life, such as work, relationships, health, and personal development. Reflect on how well each area aligns with what you want for yourself.
Ponder questions like:
1. In what areas of my life do I feel most fulfilled and aligned with what I want from my life right now?
For example: I’m committed to my career and completing this challenging project at work. I feel good about this because determination and growth are important values to me.
2. What do I absolutely have to do, and what do I want to do every day? How am I spending my time? What do these choices and activities say about me?
For example: I feel like. I’m scrolling on my phone when I’m stressed but I’d rather move my body instead. I want to work on my value of health and get better aligned with making choices that help me be healthy.
Activities to Deepen Your Understanding
1. Picture it: Create a visual representation of your values and aspirations by crafting a vision board. Think about it as an ongoing work in progress. Include images, quotes, and symbols that resonate with you and reflect the life you want to create. It could be concrete, digital or in any creative form you like. Put it out there. Don’t let it gather dust in the corner. Display your vision board in a prominent place as a daily reminder of your values and goals.
2. Journaling: Keep a journal to explore your thoughts, feelings, and experiences related to what you care about, when you feel most alive and energized. Write about moments when you felt most aligned with your values and moments when you felt out of sync. Try journal prompts such as:
- How did I make myself proud today?
- When that, person, place or thing, really bothered me, what value did it clash with?
Recognizing and living by your unique values is a powerful pathway to personal fulfillment and well-being. Take the time to explore your values, clarify them, and align your actions with them. You’ll be rewarded with a life that is rich in meaning, purpose, and authenticity.
Ready to dive deep and discover more about what’s important to you and how to align with it? Values discovery is an important part of the work I do with clients in therapy. Let’s talk and start the process.
